Parenting Your Challenging Child: Recent Programs


Finally, the "F" Word Makes Its Way Onto the Podcast! (April 6, 2021)
But probably not the "f" word you're thinking of. And, when it comes to wording unsolved problems well, even "f" words are relevant. LISTEN NOW!

Clarifying Kid & Adult Concerns (March 2, 2021)
Two callers provided lots of great conversation today - everything from sibling strife, can an adult's concern be "I feel disrespected," and how to revisit a solution that isn't working. LISTEN NOW!

Parenting During the Pandemic...and a Mom Who Was More Successful Than She Knew (January 5, 2021)
Findings from the Lives in the Balance survey on Parenting During the Pandemic are now available on the Lives in the Balance website, and were discussed at the beginning of the program. Then we heard from a mom whose first attempt at Plan B went a lot better than she realized. LISTEN NOW!

If You Need a Good Overview of the CPS Model, This Podcast Is It
(December 1, 2020)
Thanks to four parents who emailed us with questions, this podcast provides a great overview of the basic components of identifying and solving problems collaboratively and proactively. Nothing beats real life... LISTEN NOW!

Solving Problems Collaboratively Versus "Accommodating"...Not the Same Thing (November 10, 2020)
After helping a mom sort through the ins and outs of doing Plan B with her son, we turned our attention to email, including one from a mom who was concerned that doing Plan B meant she was always going to be accomodating her son's problems. Good to get that cleared up. LISTEN NOW!

What's Going Wrong With This Plan B? (October 6, 2020) 
On today's program, we responded to a mom whose son was having difficulty participating in the Define Adult Concerns step and Invitation step of Plan B, promPting some hopefully helpful words of wisdom from our panel. Also covered: should consuquences be used in tandem with Plan B...and should parents explain Plan B to kids before doing it? LISTEN NOW!

Solving Problems Collaboratively Has Never Been More Important (September 8, 2020)
And we're back...with the first segment of Parenting Your Challenging Child of the fall, after a very tumultuous summer. We responded to two moms with specific concerns about how to approach unsolved problems using Plans B and C, but a lot of the themes were the same as usual, whether related to parenting or society: the importance of listening to each other, empathizing with one another's concerns, and solving problems collaboratively. LISTEN NOW!

Fear and Trembling Before the First Plan B (May 5, 2020)
On this program, a very endearing grandma called in to get some guidance before trying her first Plan B with her grandson. Yes, Plan B is a different animal, but perfection is not the goal. She sounds like she's it's time to take the leap. LISTEN NOW!

Three Plans, Two Ways to Apply Them (April 7, 2020)
After checking in regarding how everyone is fairing with the COVID-19 restrictions, we talked in detail about the emergency application of Plans A, B, and C thanks to an emailer's question.  We also addressed whether the lagging skill of chronic irritability and/or anxiety can be addressed through proactive Plan B. LISTEN NOW!

Collaboration in Trying Times: A Special Edition of Parenting Your Challenging Child (March 27, 2020)
Collaboration and empathy have never been more important under the current circumstances. But let's get practical: school is closed, your kids are home, you may be on the hook for overseeing distance learning, and you need some guidance! LISTEN NOW!

Surviving School Vacations (March 3, 2020)
Great conversation today about surviving school vacations, expectations for connecting with family, and what to do when you find yourself in the heat of the moment when out in public. LISTEN NOW

Is this a realistic expectation for my child? (January 7, 2020)
Lots of territory covered on today's podcast, including a discussion on how to know whether an expectation that's being placed on a child is actually reasonable. LISTEN NOW

Holiday cheer (December 3, 2019)
Holidays are a tough time for families, perhaps especially those with kids with social, emotional, and behavioral challenges. But it doesn't have to be that way, especially if parents are being responsive to the hand they've been dealt. LISTEN NOW

Young kids, impulsive kids, & getting started with CPS  (October 1, 2019)
Started out with some technical difficulties but ended up with a fantastic episode!  Thanks to a caller, we talked about how to get started with the model, uses of the model, and wording of unsolved problems.  We also answered two emails - one about how the model works with young kids and one about using the model with an impulsive kid. LISTEN NOW

Back for the 2019-2020 School Year with a Bang  (September 10, 2019)
Lots of great updates from the Summer, then we covered an email from a parent who was interested to know how we view the ADHD diagnosis.  Thanks to a caller, we took a deep dive into using Plan B with screen time. LISTEN NOW

A mishmash of topics  (May 7, 2019)
On our last program for the 2018-19 school year, we talked with a caller about her son's school frustrations and how to best work with the school.  Covered two emails as well - one asking about the PDA diagnosis and how to work with non-verbal kids, the other asking what to do when kids don't talk and when they don't follow through on solutions. LISTEN NOW

One mom, two boys and a lot of unsolved problems  (April 2, 2019)
Thanks to a caller, we covered a lot CPS territory today including the need for a meeting of the minds among a child's team to make real progress, when to seek help to get to that consensus, and the importance of how to word unsolved problemsLISTEN NOW

Screen "addiction," aggression, and kid not talking  (March 5, 2019)
Dr. Greene addressed whether CPS can help with screen "addiction."  We also answered an email from a mother struggling with an aggressive 5-year-old.  A family wrote in about a kid who won't talk to mom. LISTEN NOW

Trouble shooting Plan B, kids in "the pit," and changing lenses  (February 5, 2019)
After a revisit of the role of Plan C, a caller got some ideas to troubleshoot her Plan B attempt with her daughter about stealing her sister's belongings.  A mother emailed in about her son "refusing to change."  ...and some fantastic updates about our documentary, The Kids We Lose! LISTEN NOW

We already have enough crisis management programs!  (January 15, 2019)
The crew fielded lots of emails on today's program, along with a phone call with a mom who needed some help with Plan B. But the key theme of the program: when you're doing Plan B, you're not focused on dealing with a child's behavior in the heat of the're solving the problems that are causing those behaviors...and you're doing it collaboratively and proactively. LISTEN NOW

Seductive screens, heat of the moment, young kids, & hard-n-fast expectations  (December 4, 2018)
Lots covered on today's show thanks to many emailed questions (despite some technical issues): My son won't get off his phone to talk, what to do when big behaviors happen - won't my kid think it's ok to act that way?, working with 3-6 year olds in a Montessori setting, and expectations that aren't optional. LISTEN NOW

Consequences, choice, self-care, not talking...oh my!  (November 13, 2018)
On this episode, we covered lots of questions/topics that came in via email - how do consequences fit in with CPS?  When is it choice and when is it not?  The importance of self-care and I can't get my kid to talk to name a few. LISTEN NOW

Reluctant Spouses  (October 2, 2018)
On our first radio program of the fall, we heard from a mom who's having trouble getting her husband on board with solving problems collaboratively with their son. There seems to be a lot of that going around, and the mom came away with lots of ideas for moving forward. Listen to the program and you will too! LISTEN NOW

Skill building, the dreaded cell phone, kids not listening and refusing (May 1, 2018) 
On our last call for this school year, a caller asked for help with her son refusing his Summer school program, plus we answered 3 emails from parents asking for help with the model. LISTEN NOW

Working Upstream & Delving into Plan C (April 2, 2018) 
Lots covered on this month's program including why use CPS with neurotypical kids?  Also, help for a father who can't get his kid to talk and lots of discussion about proactive and emergency Plan C. LISTEN NOW

Reflections on the Parkland Tragedy & Other Hot Topics (March 6, 2018) 
Dr. Greene joined in the program today to offer reflections on the Parkland tragedy, and to partake in our continued discussion about what to do when your co-parent is not on board with CPS, as well as can you do CPS with young kids?LISTEN NOW

A CPS Smorgasbord (February 6, 2018) 
Lots of territory covered on today's program: How do you keep drilling when a kid says he doesn't have a problem with the unsolved problem? What do you do when the kid talks but says a lot of things that don't seem to have anything to do with the unsolved problem? What do you do when your co parent isn't on board with CPS? LISTEN NOW

Plan C Isn't About Giving In...It's About Stabilizing (January 2, 2018)
We covered some important territory on today's program...on one call, a mom needed some reassurance that the Plan C she was doing with her daughter represented her conscious, deliberate effort to stabilize things...and that getting some Plan B back into the mix is her next step. LISTEN NOW

Parents Do Well If They Can (December 5, 2017) 
Alas, the holidays are upon us, and it's the time of year when people are often nicer, kinder, gentler, more patient, and more empathic. So what's going wrong this year? Good to be reminded that we all do well if we can, and that we all exhibit challenging behavior (some more severe than others) when expectations outstrip skills. But we also a lot of trouble-shooting on today's program... LISTEN NOW

Getting Going and Bumps Along the Way (November 7, 2017) 
Thanks to the questions of a caller and a few emailers, we discussed how to get started with the CPS model, what to do if a solution isn't working, what to do with "I don't know," and how to handle defiance in the heat of the moment. LISTEN NOW

A Little Bit of Everything (October 3, 2017) 
Siblings that don't play well together, the word "no," what to do in the heat of the moment, and what to do when a solution doesn't work...all covered on today's program, thanks to our B Team Parent Leaders and the fantastic questions we received from listeners! LISTEN NOW

Bringing the Joy Back to Parenting (September 5, 2017)
On our first program of the new broadcast year, Dr. Greene welcomed his new co-hosts, Kim Hopkins-Betts (Director of Outreach at Lives in the Balance) and Jennifer, a B Team leader and parent. They were able to respond to several emails, including one from a mom who's been struggling with her behaviorally challenging 14-year old daughter for a very long time and who hasn't experienced much joy as a parent in recent memory. LISTEN NOW

Yup, Parents Can Have Lagging Skills Too (May 1, 2017) 
So, if a parent feels like his or her lagging skills are contributing to challenging episodes with his or her child, then how does the parent learn the skills? The same way the kid does: by participating in Plan B, preferably proactively. LISTEN NOW

Pitchforks and Torches Do Not Solve Problems or Teach Skills (April 3, 2017)
There sure are a lot of parents who are struggling to get their schools to solve problems collaboratively with their students...and we heard from many of those parents on today's program. LISTEN NOW

It's a Jungle Out There! (March 6, 2017) 
It's a jungle out there for many behaviorally challenging kids, and we had another stark reminder of that sad fact on today's program. LISTEN NOW 

Beware the Preordained Soluiton (February 6, 2017) 
On today's program, we discussed one of the ways in which Plan B can go off the rails: adults entering Plan B with a preordained solution. Remember, a mutually satisfactory is one that addresses the concerns of both partiesnot the solution the adult had envisioned before initiating Plan B. LISTEN NOW 

The Good Thing About Blips (January 9, 2017) 
Today we heard from a mom whose son hadn't had an explosion in months, and then -- when a video game didn't pan out as he'd hoped -- it got ugly. So we talked a little about the up side of blips, including the fact that we all have 'em. LISTEN NOW 

Looming IEP Meeting! (December 5, 2016) 
Lots of territory covered on today's program, including some guidance for a mom from overseas who's hoping an IEP will get the folks at school to solve problems collaboratively with her son. LISTEN NOW

The Explosive Child Returns! (November 21 2016) 
At the age of 26, he isn't explosive anymore...but he took the time to call in to today's program -- the 200th segment of Parenting Your Challenging Child -- to tell us about his journey and remind us all of why we do what we do. LISTEN NOW

Angelic at School, Explosive at Home...What Gives? (November 14, 2016) 
If Kids do well if they can is true, then why would a kid behave perfectly at school and be a lot more difficult at home? Answers to that question and others are provided...LISTEN NOW

If It's Not Collaborative, It's Not Plan B (October 24, 2016)
Are you setting limits when you're doing Plan B? Of course! You're setting limits whenever you're working collaboratively with kids on unmet expectations...and doing it collaboratively is far more productive than doing it unilaterally. LISTEN NOW

The Log Gets Rid of The Blob (October 17, 2016) 
Lots of territory covered, as usual, on today's program...but we started off with good reasons to keep a log of incompatibility episodes: if you don't identify specific unsolved problems, then those episodes become one big blob (defined as a shapeless mass) can't solve problems unless you know what they are, and that's the first step in getting rid of the blob. LISTEN NOW

Too Big to Sling Over the Shoulder (October 3, 2016)
What do you do when you can't sling your 15-year old over your shoulder anymore during meltowns? Solve those problems collaboratively and proactively. But that's not the only question that was answered during today's program. LISTEN NOW

Back to Can't Versus Won't (September 26, 2016)
Some great phone discussions today...we received an update from an old friend about a kid we've known for years, helped a mom try to extract more information from her adolescent daughter, and revisited the can't versus won't debate (which shouldn't be a debate at all anymore)...LISTEN NOW

The Antidote for Parental Guilt: Back to Plan B (September 19, 2016)
Parents sometimes behave in ways that they then regret. What to do afterward? Plan B. What to do beforehand? Plan B. Does a psychiatric or special education label move things along? Not when it comes to identifying lagging skills and unsolved problems. LISTEN NOW 

All Siblings Fight...Right? (September 12, 2016) 
On this, our first program of fall, 2016, Dr. Greene and Susy responded to lots of questions, including several about how to use Plan B on problems causing conflict between siblings. LISTEN NOW

I Still Have Expectations, Right? (May 23, 2016)
If you're using the CPS model, does that mean you no longer have expectations for a child? Goodnesss, no! You can't parent without expectations; you can't have influence without expectations. How you respond when your child is having difficulty meeting your expectations...well, that's where Plan B comes in real handy. LISTEN NOW

What IS My Expectation? (May 16, 2016) 
We adults are a whole lot better at noticing behaviors we don't like in our kids than we are at identifying expectations the kids are having difficulty meeting...and that's the hard part in wording unsolved problems. Fortunately, help is provided! LISTEN NOW

Muscle Memory (May 9, 2016)
If you're solving problems proactively, does that help you out if you're stuck in the heat of the moment? This and lots of other questions answered on today's program! LISTEN NOW

Looking for the Right School
(April 25, 2016)
What are the characteristics of a good school for a behaviorally challenging kid? You'll have to listen to the program to find out. And that's not all that was discussed on today's program...LISTEN NOW 

Empathy in the Midst of Plan A (April 11, 2016)
As always, lots of territory covered with our callers on today's program...but we began with an article from the Huffington Post about a mom who demonstrated great empathy for her son in the midst of Plan A. The big question: why didn't she do Plan B instead? LISTEN NOW

More Than a Diagnosis Can Tell (April 4, 2016) 
As always, lots of territory covered on today's program, with numerous repeat callers, and also a dad who's found his son described perfectly in the diagnostic criteria for Pathological Demand usual, he was encouraged to dig even further to understand the factors contributing to his son's difficulties. LISTEN NOW

Different Points on the Journey (March 28, 2016)
All callers on today's parent struggling with getting the ball rolling on solving problems collaboratively, another facing unique challenges along the way, and still another providing an update on where things are at three years in. LISTEN NOW

Running on Empty (March 21, 2016) 
How do you recharge your batteries when your behaviorally challenging kid has you completely tapped out? New lenses can help; someone who understands can help, too. But nothing tops seeing things moving in the right direction. LISTEN NOW

Give Your Kid the Fingers (March 14, 2016) 
Yes, the title of this program might have thrown you off, but if kids are having difficulty expressing their concerns in the Empathy step of Plan B, Dr. Greene's five finger method is worth knowing about. And you can learn about it in his responses to today's callers...LISTEN NOW

Pathological Demand Avoidance (March 7, 2016)
As usual, lots of territory covered on today's program, including a discussion about an increasingly known psychiatric diagnosis, Pathological Demand Avoidance.  And, as usual, Dr. Greene wasn't shy in pointing out the limitis of psychiatric disorder, PDA included. LISTEN NOW 

School Blues (February 29, 2016) 
Sometimes kids with behavioral challenges are understood at school and get the help they need, sometimes not so much. On today's program, we heard from two moms who are having a "not so much" experience...LISTEN NOW 

Hitting Rock Bottom (February 8, 2016)
Lots of territory covered on today's program, including some discussion of the age levels at which the CPS model is appropriate (we can't think of any at which it's not)...but we began by discussion whether letting kids "hit rock bottom" is the best way to solve the problems that are causing them to hit rock bottom in the first place. The answer won't surprise you... LISTEN NOW 

What Does "Doing Well" Mean? (February 1, 2016)
Yes, Kids do well if they can is the most important theme of the CPS model...but what if your child's definition of "doing well" differs from yours?  LISTEN NOW

The Heat of the Moment (January 25, 2016)
What's the best thing to do in the heat of moment? Defuse, De-escalate, and keep everyone safe. And then start solving the problems that are causing things to get heated up in the moment in the first place,..once they're solved, you won't be in the heat of the moment anymore. LISTEN NOW 

He's Just Stubborn (January 11, 2016)
That's what a mom who called into the program is being told told about why her son is doing no work in his 10th grade English class.  But he's doing work in all of his other there must be an unsolved problem in English class. Sounds like a job for Plan B! LISTEN NOW 

The Real World (January 4, 2016) 
A very interesting start to the new year...on today's program, we spent some time talking with a mom who's at the beginning of her CPS journey...and responding to a dad who was struggling with whether CPS would help his son deal with the demands of The Real World. LISTEN NOW

Beginning, Slogging, and Getting Ready (December 14, 2015)
Lots of callers on today's just getting started on Plan B, another slogging through the mud with a solution that hasn't been durable, and a seasoned hand getting ready for what could be a tough discussion. All part of the process... LISTEN NOW

"I'm Afraid I'm Losing My Kids" (December 7, 2014)
Among the parents Dr. Greene and Susy responded to on today's program was a mom who's been struggling with her children's behavioral challenges for a long time and feels they're slipping away. LISTEN NOW

It's About Time (November 30, 2015) 
This is a program worth listening to...a dad called in to provide us with an update on his first attempt at Plan B with his son...he heard concerns from his son that a wooden spoon (the primary problem-solving tool from the father's upbringing) wouldn't have addressed. But the key theme for the day was TIME: Plan B saves it, but it takes time and planning to get that ball rolling...LISTEN NOW 

School Blues (November 16, 2015) 
As we were reminded by the mom who called in near the end of the program, it can be very difficult to get schools to break out of traditional ways of operating to help behaviorally challenging students...but, as many schools throughout the world have shown, it can be done... LISTEN NOW

Need Convincing? Do Plan B! (November 9, 2015)
The best way to become convinced about the effectiveness of Plan B is to start using Plan B...and that was a consistent theme during today's program. LISTEN NOW 

Hard to Give Up Those Consequences (November 2, 2015)
We heard from a few moms on today's is grappling with her son's behavior problems at school. While the school counselor is receptive to solving problems collaboratively, she also wants to keep using adult-imposed consequences for behaviors that the child can "control." A good discussion of the things consequences do and don't do well... LISTEN NOW

Where to Begin? (October 26, 2015)
Once caregivers identify a child's lagging skills and unsolved problems -- and there can be many of both -- it can be hard to home in on the top priorities...important to remember that all progress is incremental. LISTEN NOW

We'll Never Know for Sure (October 19, 2015)
Could early childhood experiences affect a child's behavior later? Of course! How can you know the effects of those experiences? You probably can't know with great precision. What can you work on now? Lagging skills and unsolved problems...LISTEN NOW

Creative Drilling (October 5, 2015)
A mom -- who'd called in the week before to get some help drilling for information with her son -- called in again to provide an update...and her creative drilling strategies were very effective at helping her son communicate his concerns! A good program to listen to for parents who are struggling in the Empathy step of Plan B.  LISTEN NOW

Why Aren't the Solutions Working? (September 28, 2015)
As always, a lot of territory was covered on this program, including a mom who called in for help figuring out why the solutions that are being applied to her son's difficulties haven't been accomplishing the mission. LISTEN NOW 

The ALSUP Demystifies Challenging Behavior (September 21, 2015)
Challenging behavior isn't a puzzle anymore when you put the Assessment of Lagging Skills and Unsolved Problems (ALSUP) to work. LISTEN NOW

The Journey Has Begun (May 18, 2015) 
On this, our last program of this "broadcast year" (the program airs from September through May), we responded to emails from several parents and talked with a mental health professional who's finding the CPS model very much in keeping with her values.  And, to close, we read emails from parents who are just beginning their CPS journeys with their children...we can't wait to hear back from them in September! LISTEN NOW 

The Problem With "When" (May 11, 2015) 
When you're working on what happens WHEN an unsolved problem has already caused challenging behavior, you're focused on the aftermath of the problem.  So you don't want to work on want to paddle upstream and start solving problems BEFORE they cause those behaviors that are floating downstream. LISTEN NOW 

ABA versus CPS (May 4, 2015)
Are ABA (applied behavior analysis) and CPS completely incompatible?  Well, CPS won't have you rewarding and punishing your child...but the real answer is that it depends on who you ask. LISTEN NOW 

Is "Stealing" a Lagging Skill, an Unsolved Problem, or None of the Above? (April 27, 2015)
Some great questions answered on today's program, including the one in the title...but also how to transform "No" into an unsolved problem. LISTEN NOW

Why Are There So Many Behaviorally Challenging Kids These Days? (April 13, 2015)
Unfortunately, there are lots of things that have changed for the worse for kids in the last 40-50 years...maybe that explains it... LISTEN NOW 

On the Same Page (April 6, 2015)
On today's program we heard from a long-time caller who's been implementing the CPS model with her sons for over three years. We reflected a little on the "good old days," heard about how far her sons have come, and learned that Plan A isn't necessarily the best way to help a spouse get on board with Plan B! LISTEN NOW

The Heat of the Moment (March 30, 2015)
What should you do when your child is already in the midst of an explosive outburst?  Defuse, de-escalate, keep everyone safe.  Then figure out what just happened (so it doesn't happen again). LISTEN NOW 

Challenging at Home, Not at School...Why? (March 23, 2015)
Challenging behavior occurs when the demands being placed upon a kid outstrip the skills the kid has to respond adaptively.  And the embarrassment factor plays a role as well.  LISTEN NOW 

Is There a Downside to Collaborating with Kids? (March 16, 2015)
A lot of territory covered on today's program, including a discussion on the following question:  If you're always collaborating with a kid and working toward mutually satisfactory solutions, won't the kid come to believe that he needs to meet expectations only when he feels like it? LISTEN NOW

Paddling Upstream (March 2, 2015)
If you're only paying attention to a child's challenging behavior, then modifying or medicating the behavior will make the most sense.  But behavior is what's going on downstream.  If you paddle upstream -- toward the problems that are causing the behavior -- other intervention strategies start to make a lot more sense. LISTEN NOW 

Are Consequences the Only Way to Set Limits and Establish Boundaries? (February 23, 2015)
As usual, lots of questions answered and topics covered from the mailbag during today's program, including the one in the title. LISTEN NOW

Unmet Needs or Concerns? (February 9, 2015)
When you're in the Empathy step, are you seeking information about a child's concerns or unmet needs? It's the former...when you're focused on the latter, you're more likely to hear about the child's solutions (rather than his or her concerns)and brainstorming solutions shouldn't occur until the Invitation. LISTEN NOW

It All Begins with the Assessment of Lagging Skills and Unsolved Problems (January 26, 2015)
We turned to the mailbag on today's program, and responded to inquiries from five parents.  But there was a fairly consistent theme:  it all begins with the Assessment of Lagging Skills and Unsolved Problems. LISTEN NOW 

The Proof's in the Pudding: What to Tell Kids About Plan B (January 12, 2015)
One of the questions parents frequently have relates to how much to tell kids about Plan B. That question -- and a whole bunch of others -- were discussed on today's program. LISTEN NOW 

Three Boys Under the Age of Eight! (January 5, 2015)
Maybe the title of today's program tells you all you need to know...but maybe not! While it's tempting to use Plan A to keep things organized and keep life moving when there's three boys under the age of eight in one household, Plan B can probably help more than you might think. LISTEN NOW

Ups and Downs of the Embarrassment Factor (December 15, 2014)
A variety of topics were covered on the last program of 2014, including a rather in-depth discussion of the "embarrassment factor" (kids who can hold it together outside of the home but are very challenging inside the home).  Just because a kid is holding it together outside of the home doesn't mean there aren't problems to be solved. LISTEN NOW

The "Therapeutic" Hold and the "Healthy" Smack: Some Things Just Don't Go Together (December 8, 2014)
Lots of ground covered on today's program -- a mom whose son becomes upset when he gets hurt phsyically, an emailer who noticed that the CPS model has moved from "baskets" to "Plans," from emergent to proactive, and from "compromising" to problem-solving -- but the most moving email came from a mom whose son is still being placed in restraint and seclusion at school. LISTEN NOW

The Morphing Unsolved Problem (December 1, 2014) 
It's not uncommon to start Plan B with one unsolved problem and then learn about other unsolved problems that will require separate solutions.  Thanks to a caller, that's one of the things we talked about on today's program...LISTEN NOW 

Double-Header: Two Kids Having Difficulty Participating in Plan B (November 24, 2014)
What do you do if your child is having difficulty providing information in the Empathy step of Plan B? We're glad you (and two of our callers) asked! LISTEN NOW

Premature Solutions (November 17, 2014)
On today's program, Ross and Susy spoke with a mom who's thinking of pulling her son out of school due to poor performance...but will that solution really solve the problem? Or does the mom need more information about what's getting in the way for her son at school before they can start contemplating solutions? Plus a lot more... LISTEN NOW 

How Do I Explain This? (November 10, 2014)
Explaining Collaborative & Proactive Solutions (CPS) to a kid can be a challenge, but this radio program should help you out. And if you've been very focused on imploring your child to take responsibility for his actions, you'll probably want to listen to the rest of the program as well. LISTEN NOW

You Need Info! (some creative ways to get it) (October 27, 2014)
If you're wondering about what to do if your child is having difficulty providing you with information about his/her concern, perspective, or point of view in the Empathy step of Plan B, this program should help out...thanks to one of our callers. LISTEN NOW

What's More Informative? The Diagnoses or Lagging Skills and Unsolved Problems? (October 20, 2014)
Susy and Dr. Greene covered a lot of ground on today's program, including helping a mom whose daughter has been diagnosed with generalized and social anxiety get more focused on her daughter's specific lagging skills and unsolved problems. LISTEN NOW

Debbie's Lagging Skills and Unsolved Problems (September 29, 2014)
On today's program, we helped Debbie's mom with the wording of unsolved problems on the Assessment of Lagging Skills and Unsolved Problems.  Now we're ready to start solving those problems collaboratively and proactively! LISTEN NOW

Getting to Know Debbie (September 22, 2014)
On today's program, we helped a mom begin identyfing the lagging skills and unsolved problems contributing to the challenging episodes of her daughter (who we're calling Debbie), using the Assessment of Lagging Skills and Unsolved Problems (ALSUP) as our guide. Once the problems are identified, the task of solving them begins...along with the adventure of getting to know Debbie. LISTEN NOW 

Different Points on the Journey (September 15, 2014)
Our callers made this a very poignant program. The first was a dad who's been using the CPS model for some time now. He had some very encouraging news. The second was a mom who's just at the beginning of her CPS journey. And the third was a mom who's in the middle of her journey and needing to make some slight adjustments. Beware: due to circumstances beyond our comprehension, the program cuts off unexpectedly near the end. LISTEN NOW

What Is Challenging Behavior Communicating? (September 8, 2014)
Well, Parenting Your Challenging Child is back on the air for another nine months, and Dr. Greene and his new co-host, Susy, kicked things off by responding to emails from several parents and a parent who called in...all seeking guidance on how to apply the CPS model to their challenging kids. Key theme of the day: though challenging behavior is very concerning and stressful, it's really just a very unpleasant way for a child to communicate that he or she is lacking the skills to handle certain demands and expectations. LISTEN NOW

The Empathy Corner (May 19, 2014)
Some great information on today's program -- the last until September -- including information on collaborating with kids on social difficulties. But one parent told us, by email, about something she and her husband do with her son when it doesn't seem like there's a problem to be solved but their son does need to be heard: they call it the Empathy Corner. LISTEN NOW 

Same Song, Different Tune (May 12, 2014)
Should you solve problems collaboratively with your not-so-challenging kids? Today's first caller has doubts about the answer to that question. LISTEN NOW 

The Meaning of Strength (May 5, 2014)
Parents of behaviorally challenging kids are often told that they need to be stronger, firmer, and more consistent...and yet, as discussed on today's Parents Panel, solving problems collaboratively takes a lot of strength too...and parents seem to feel a lot stronger when they know how to solve problems together with their children. LISTEN NOW 

Getting Into That Plan B Habit (April 28, 2014)
As always, lots of questions answered on today's program. One of the key points: once Plan B becomes a habit, kids (and caregivers) listen better to each others' concerns because they aren't so worried about having their own concerns blown off the table. LISTEN NOW 

How Do the Skills Get Taught? (April 14, 2014)
As always, lots of territory was covered on today's program, including a call from an overwhelmed mom who wanted to know how to get started on helping her behaviorally challenging child. But, early on, Dr. Greene explained how kids learn skills when they're engaged in solving problems collaboratively. And at the end of the program, he reminded us that adults learn skills through the same process. LISTEN NOW

April Parents Panel: Being Responsive and Collaborating at All Ages (April 7, 2014)
The Parents Panel covered a wide range of topics on today's program, but the starting and ending theme went something like this: Is there any age at which you wouldn't try to be responsive to the hand you've been dealt and try to understand and address your child's concerns? The answer from the Panel was a resounding No. LISTEN NOW 

Caught Up in the Diagnoses (March 24, 2014)
Dr. Greene made his way through lots of email today, and there was a key them that cut across many of them: while psychiatric diagnoses can be useful in some ways, identifying your child's lagging skills and unsolved problems is almost always more informative and productive. LISTEN NOW

Why Won't He Talk to Us? (March 10, 2014)
Lots of good info on today's program. We heard back from last week's mom, who's starting to organize the effort in working on her son's behavioral challenges. Dr. Greene also answered a bunch of questions he received via email, including one from a mom who's wondering why her son won't talk to her when she's trying to gather information in the Empathy step of Plan B. LISTEN NOW

March Parents Panel: Can I Still Do the Old Stuff? (March 3, 2014)
Many parents wonder if they need to completely drop their old ways of doing things when they're implementing Dr. Greene's CPS model, and the Educators Panel had some ideas about that...and then responded to a very distressed mom looking for some guidance. LISTEN NOW

You Gotta Know What You're Working On (February 24, 2014)
Thanks to our callers and emailers, lots of good information on this program...but a familiar theme kept coming through: identifying unsolved problems helps you know what you're working on, makes challenging episodes predictable, and helps you intervene proactively. LISTEN NOW

February Parents Panel: Hearing, Clarifying, & Validating (February 3, 2014)
We returned to siblings today on the Parents Panel, and had a very interesting discussion about the pressure parents feel to agree or disagree with a child's concerns (and to take sides). The reality is that agreeing/disagreeing and taking sides are often counterproductive, can lead to conflict, and are unnecessary anyway. But you'll have to listen to the program to hear the rest. LISTEN NOW

Raised on Plan A, Trying to Roll with Plan B (January 27, 2014)
Dr. Greene answered lots of emailed questions on today's program, including one from two parents who were themselves raised on Plan A, recognize that Plan A isn't working for their behaviorally challenging child, are doing their best to roll with Plan B, and finding the road to be rocky. LISTEN NOW

At the Fork in the Road (January 13, 2014)
What do you do when Plan A keeps backfiring but you want to feel like you still have some control as a parent? That's the gist of what today's first caller was asking...and Dr. Greene's answer was "Plan B".  She has her work cut out for her...but at least she's starting to become clear on the fact that Plan A isn't getting the job done. LISTEN NOW

January Parents Panel: A Sibling Tells It Like It Is (January 6, 2014)
Our first program (and Parents Panel) of 2014 was a poignant one, as we heard from the sibling of a previously explosive child. She had some words of wisdom for all of us. LISTEN NOW

Prioritizing Unsolved Problems (December 16, 2013)
On the last program of 2013, Dr. Greene answered some parent email questions. Topics discussed include redefining descriptions of behaviorally challenging kids in a more helpful way, initiating conversations about very specific topics, and prioritizing problems that may be best solved after more information is gathered. LISTEN NOW

December Parents Panel: Advice for Parents Starting Out (December 9, 2013)
Dr. Greene was joined today by our Parents Panel, who shared advice for parents beginning to implement the CPS* model with their children. The panel shared what changed for the better and what mistakes they learned from along the way, including the discovery that some traditional pillars of parenting may actually be counterproductive in working with behaviorally challenging kids.LISTEN NOW

Plan B with a Teen (November 25, 2013)
Plan B with a teenager may require some special considerations, like how to deal with skepticism (and eye-rolling) from your teen as you start out with the model. Dr. Greene offers a live caller some advice on how to implement the model with her teenage daughter, stressing the importance of drilling, the usefulness of theories, and how to introduce the model after years of Plan A. LISTEN NOW

Exploring Other Forms of Communication (November 18, 2013)
Dr. Greene answers a parent inquiry regarding using the model with a child who is nonverbal. Other topics discussed include using resources to encourage educators to change the lenses with which they view behaviorally challenging children and recognizing that not all kids (even in the same family) respond to the same parenting style. Dr. Greene also shares his thoughts on violent video games. LISTEN NOW

November Parents Panel: Building Trust (November 4, 2013)
Dr. Greene was joined by our Parents Panel today, who helped field concerns from live callers. The first caller reports her success in having Plan B conversations with her son, which has increased the level of trust in their relationship and taught her about her own lagging skills. LISTEN NOW

Back to Basics (October 28, 2013)
On this episode, we hear from two live callers who are trying the model, as well as a parent who is at the end of her rope with daughter’s challenging behavior. Dr. Greene troubleshoots, reminding us how important the Empathy Step is. LISTEN NOW

Changes Lenses (October 21, 2013)
The difficulties of behaviorally challenging kids tend to be complex, and can be further complicated when caregivers or educators are not viewing behavior through a prism of lagging skills and unsolved problems. On this program, we hear a parent's sincere concerns regarding the challenge of getting educators and other caregivers to change their lenses. Dr. Greene also dishes advice for a caller who is attempting Plan B with his young son on how to adapt the model to a child's developmental communication skills. LISTEN NOW

October Parents Panel: Communication is Key (October 6, 2013)
In this episode, our newest parents panel member, Anna, shares how Plan B has given her family hope. One caller asks for advice on how to navigate divorce with a behaviorally challenging child. Anna and Suzy advise that keeping the lines of communication open is just as important between parents as between parent and child. Panel members stress the importance of not focusing on the behavior but the precursor, and Dr. Greene weighs in on what we can learn from each challenging episode. LISTEN NOW

Just Keep Drilling (September 30, 2013)
Dr. Greene answered more emails from the summer.  Among the questions answered: What to do when kids don't talk in the Empathy step of Plan B, whether Plan B can be applied to toilet training, and how to help kids who are holding it together during the school day but are challenging at home. LISTEN NOW

Success Stories (September 23, 2013)
We heard from a few callers today who related some of the successes they're having in using Plan B...and were reminded (by way of another's mom's email) that we want to focus not on what a child does in response to an unsolved problem (i.e., his behavior) but rather on the unsolved problem giving rise to that response. LISTEN NOW

The Invitation Step of Plan B (September 16, 2013)
Dr. Greene tried to catch up on summer emails during this program, and started with one asking for more information about the Invitation step of Plan B.  Of course, you'll have to listen to the program to hear everything else! LISTEN NOW

September Parents Panel: "Trying Harder" Isn't A Great Solution (September 9, 2013)
After a summer hiatus, we jump-started the program with the Parents Panel, and had a nice opportunity to get reminders on a few of the key tenets of solving problems collaboratively:  Plan B is far more effective when it's done proactively, and also more effective when it's focused on a specific unsolved problem rather than a challenging behavior (such as hitting) that applies to many different unsolved problems. LISTEN NOW